Self-Compassion vs. Self-Criticism: Why Beating Yourself Up Doesn't Work
Gary Hominick Gary Hominick

Self-Compassion vs. Self-Criticism: Why Beating Yourself Up Doesn't Work

We've all been there. You slip up, and immediately a harsh inner voice takes over: "I'm lazy," "I can't do anything right," "I deserve this guilt." It feels productive—like punishment will finally motivate you to change. But research reveals something counterintuitive: self-criticism is one of the least effective motivational strategies for long-term success. In fact, self-compassion—treating yourself with the same kindness you'd offer a good friend—is far more effective at driving sustained motivation, emotional resilience, and meaningful growth. The difference comes down to two types of motivation: fear-based (doing things to avoid punishment) versus values-based (doing things because they matter to you). When you operate from fear, your brain enters a threat state that actually undermines your ability to change. But when you respond to setbacks with compassion, you activate your nervous system's growth mode, improve your emotional regulation, and build resilience that lasts. This article explores why self-punishment backfires, examines real-world examples of how poor self-treatment sabotages your goals, and reveals practical ways to practice self-compassion that genuinely work.

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Why Men Struggle in Silence: Counseling for Porn Use, Affairs, and Shame
Gary Hominick Gary Hominick

Why Men Struggle in Silence: Counseling for Porn Use, Affairs, and Shame

Many men turn to pornography or affairs as a way to cope with stress, loneliness, or emotional disconnection—then carry the weight of shame alone. Men’s counseling offers a non-judgmental space to understand these patterns, take responsibility, and move toward healthier relationships. This article explores why men often struggle in silence and how therapy can become a turning point toward lasting change.

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Can a Marriage Survive Infidelity? What Affair Recovery Counseling Really Looks Like
Gary Hominick Gary Hominick

Can a Marriage Survive Infidelity? What Affair Recovery Counseling Really Looks Like

After an affair, couples are often left feeling shocked, disconnected, and unsure if their relationship can recover. Infidelity counseling provides a structured, supportive process to address betrayal, rebuild emotional safety, and restore trust over time. This article explains what couples therapy after cheating actually involves—and why healing is possible, even after deep relational wounds.

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Is Pornography Ruining My Relationship? How Therapy Can Help Men Rebuild Trust
Gary Hominick Gary Hominick

Is Pornography Ruining My Relationship? How Therapy Can Help Men Rebuild Trust

Pornography use can quietly erode trust, intimacy, and emotional connection in a relationship—especially when it becomes secretive or compulsive. Many men struggle in silence, unsure whether their behavior is “serious enough” to seek help. This article explores how pornography addiction counseling helps men understand the emotional drivers behind their behavior, reduce shame, and begin rebuilding trust with their partner.

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